(OP Corner) Rebirth of Team 7: The Strongest Team Under the Heavens
by Tremor230
Summary: AU, OOC Rated M. this is the new version of "Strongest Team Under the Heavens" with different powers for Sasuke, Sakura and Naruto and different back-story. Summ: Konoha needs a new Team 7 after the Failed Suna Invasion killed the last one: it's time for Naruto, Sasuke and Sakura to join the fun! A pity they have a slightly "Different" kind of abilities...to say the least.
1. Pilot Chapter

**OKAY! FINE! I will rewrite this story instead of simply remove it, here is the first draft of the new Version, the first chapter of it to be precise. But I won't update until enough stories on-going are completed, so see to have this be enough, okay!?**

 **AND THIS IS STILL A "PILOT" SO IT WILL PROBABLY CHANGE AS WELL!  
**

 **Next chapter will focus more on Sakura and Sasuke's abilities as THEY are the fighting components of Team 7 while Naruto will stay on the back and be the Medic. So in this chapter I will give some more space to Naruto and his abilities as Medic.**

 **Really, I am spoiling you others too much...I don't have all this time to write dammit...**

 **To be clear:**

 **Naruto is similar to '** _Black Jack' of Osamu Tezuka's manga_ **, similar back-story and slightly better as a surgeon for reason I'll explain later in the story.**

 **Sakura is still using Venom but I changed her back-story for it.**

 **Sasuke is a Nen-User, unsure if making him more similar to** _Isaac Netero_ **or** _Kurapika_ **power-wise. I'll decide when it will be time to worry about updates.**

" **You bastard"** \- demon talking / jutsu

"Let's finish this" - dialogue

" _Can it get any worse?_ " - during flashback/Thoughts

 **Pairing: Sasu/Saku**

 **Naru/...Who the fuck would stay with a** _Jerk with an Heart of Gold_ **? Help? I was thinking about Karui but I am not even sure.**

 **Chapter 1: The Rebirth of Team 7.**

 **Somewhere near Wave Country – sea -**

A solitary boat was rapidly sailing the waters occupied by only two people, one the man governing the thing and the other standing on the front looking with a mixture of worry and determination at the rapidly approaching small island.

No-one could at first glance, without actually stop to look better, recognize in the strange passenger one of the most famous ninjas of Konoha; his usually gravity-defying silver hair had been tied in a tight ponytail then covered with a plain black bandanna, his usual face-mask had been switched with a medical one one could find in any hospital while a plain eye-patch covered his eye in place of his forehead protector. Once dressed as a civilian Hatake Kakashi could more or less appear like any random villager from any small settlement as long as he kept his head low and his chakra signature suppressed.

In those times of turmoil, a normal **Henge** was a sure-way to attract the worst kind of attention, especially for someone coming from the Leaf Village, and he had to travel pretty far for this Mission; he just hoped a mere change of clothes would suffice to keep bandits and Missing-nins' attacks to a minimum.

"You really want to meet _Kurotsune-_ _sensei_ _?_ Like this? He doesn't like people showing-up without an appointment, his bodyguard usually sink ships before they can even reach the shore...and you are better not knowing what happens to those shinobi doing their water-walking-thingy to go there uninvited." the boat owner muttered while looking ahead nervous.

"Kurotsune?" Kakashi asked faking curiosity and without looking away from the island.

"From ' _Kuro_ ' since he always wears a black cloak and ' _Kitsune'_ for the whiskers he has on one cheek...he may have the hands of God when operating on someone, but he is not exactly a friendly fella. Avid of money and almost cruel in his dealing with patients. The guy may be young, but if he wants he operates you in a way that both saves your life and makes you wish you died...dozen of doctors challenged his methods and ideals, and he humiliated every single one of them with his ability as a surgeon in such an outlandish way that more than half stopped being doctors out of shame..." the man replied shaking his head to steel himself.

"That good?"

"A God..."

"I see, and what about his guard?"

"Someone says he is a shinobi, others that he is one of those cultist preaching about their strange spiritual energy...whatever is the truth that guy once slaughtered a dozen men with a deck of cards...I don't know what happened exactly, but I saw one of those cards behead an adult man and pierce the wall behind him all the way through until it got struck on a tree several meters behind the wall almost cutting that down as well...those two are monsters, definitely not human."

"I understand what you mean, but I still need to meet that doctor." Kakashi answered nodding.

"Without an appointment?" the boat owner added shivering.

"That is what I paid you extra for, to forget that detail." the Konoha Jounin answered.

"Y-yes. But at the first sight of danger I bolt and you'll have to swim there yourself." the other answered.

"So be it." Kakashi answered.

The rest of the trip passed in silence as inside Kakashi's head echoed the meeting with the Hokage that happened barely the previous day before his departing for Wave.

 **The Previous day – Konoha – Hokage Tower -**

"A twenty-year old surgery genius and his bodyguard?" Kakashi asked with a raised eyebrow.

"We need Team 7, Kakashi." Tsunade said scratching her eyes tiredly.

"They are dead, Hokage-sama..." the man replied sighing.

"Suna and Sound invading us made several victims and almost crippled us to the point of no return, that's true, but the rookies all have survived besides your Team with more deaths to come had sensei not sacrificed himself to stop Orochimaru while me and Jiraiya dealt with Suna's Jinchuuriki. Now after three years we are finally recovering, but we need a full roster and so a new Team 7 must be made." Tsunade answered getting up from her seat and signaling Kakashi to follow her.

"With me as sensei?"

"Contrary to what you think, there is no curse on you or the whole idea of ' _Team 7'_ so stop mopping about that. Hiruzen-sensei himself always defended you against those stories and had he been alive today he would smack you for saying the opposite. He himself had made plans for recruiting those two in case one of the existing Teams went disbanded for any reason." Tsunade answered.

"But still...Who are those two?" Kakashi asked waving the folder in his hands.

"You should know them, one is Minato's son and the other is Itachi's little brother." the Hokage answered.

"T-T-THEY ARE ALIVE?!" the silver-haired man gasped in shock.

"You sound surprised..." the woman said bitterly.

"They had...they had disappeared under the radar for years...Naruto even swore to never become a shinobi before his disappearance!"

"Can you blame him? Before I managed to put my hands on the Hokage position the medical field of Konoha was a mess, and he was a victim of it." Tsunade answered sighing.

"What happened exactly? No-one knows the details." Kakashi asked.

"Oooh! There are people who know, don't worry. They are just covering the mess to save face." Tsunade answered bitterly.

"What happened?"

"Years ago, when Naruto was only five he wandered outside Konoha without people noticing, at the time he admired the ANBU with such a passion that he was bordering the maniacal...unfortunately a freshly-minted ANBU was in such an hurry to drop everything and meet his friends at the pub to miss a trap from their scouting..." The woman answered closing her eyes tight as if in pain.

"You don't mean...you don't mean an _explosive_ trap, right? RIGHT?!" Kakashi asked with wide eyes.

"...The explosion caught him fully as he stepped on it, launching his body above the ANBU group like a screaming ball of fire in a dozen-meters-long fly."

"Oh, God..."

"He was a mess of burned flesh, ruptured organs and broken bones, inoperable by a normal surgeon." Tsunade said shaking her head.

"And a Medic-nin?" Kakashi asked faintly.

"Ah! There came the best part, at the time in order to spare resources it had been decided that Medic-Nins could operate ONLY on shinobi for reasons of budget." the Hokage said with a bitter laugh.

"So they refused?! Isn't he...the Kyuubi Jinchuuriki?" Kakashi asked with a low whisper after looking around for eavesdroppers.

"He was a living Loop-hole at the time...Although qualified as ' _Military Asset'_ because of the Biju, he was not registered in the Academy and so not ' _legally'_ part of the shinobi forces. To that you also have to pair the fact that the at-the-time director of the Civilian Hospital had a grudge against Minato that made sure no-one would treat the boy in there." Tsunade answered sneering.

"A grudge?"

"Once sensei sent him to Ibiki the worm admitted that since he knew the boy was Minato's son he didn't want to treat him, he hated Minato for supposedly ' _stealing'_ Kushina from him, so he got his revenge on the boy." she answered.

"That bastard, what happened then?" Kakashi asked.

"A miracle, that's what happened. A stranger pretty much seized an operating room by force and saved Naruto by himself, he did the surgery alone by himself."

"Alone?"

"I saw the footage from the security cameras...he was a genius, alone doing the work of a full equip of medics, he would come second to a Medic-Nin just because we have Chakra Techniques that work slightly faster and with more precision to what he could do by himself...but while normally the differences between a Civilian Surgeon and a Shinobi one are vast, that man could easily give us a run for our money." Tsunade admitted.

"Really!? Who was he?"

"Sensei left the man leave out of gratitude for saving Naruto just because to him it was the right thing to do, but in exchange we got his name: Jotaro Honma. He ran a small clinic near Iwa before old age itself claimed his life." the woman said sighing.

"And Naruto?" Kakashi asked.

"One year to recover the use of body functions and other six months before his health was deemed perfect. He disappeared immediately after once he learned of the Shinobi he so much adored ignoring him and costing him his future."

"His future?"

"The bomb almost atomized his body, and even his chakra coils could not survive the explosion and the successive surgery, especially since Honma-sensei had not Shinobi Training and didn't know how to fix them, once healed those coils had soon shriveled down to almost nothing."

"But-but the Kyuubi..." Kakashi said shocked.

"The Fox too needs coils to send its chakra through to heal its Vessel, and only three areas of Naruto's body could still channel Chakra that had miraculously survived the incident with the lesser amount of damages: his arms, his heart and his head." Tsunade answered.

"But that would still be enough! Gai demonstrated that Rock Lee can hold his own even without Ninjutsu and Genjutsu! But Naruto can still focus in his hands so maybe he can still use jutsus!" Kakashi said immediately.

"But at the time the boy didn't know that nor people could believe a shinobi could be good only with Taijutsu as their ability. The boy simply got said that other than those three parts his body could no longer use chakra. And for that five-year-old boy: ' _No chakra, No ninja'_." Tsunade answered with a sad sigh.

"So what did he do?"

"He escaped, what else could he do? Some were already wondering how to remove the Fox from his body without killing him, so he got the answer as to why people mistrusted him AND a wake-up call on the cruelty of our world in a single go. One night he simply disappeared and Sensei later learned that he had joined Honma in his clinic under the fake identity of _Tobio_ _Tenma_ , disappearing from the surface of earth for ten years as Hiruzen-sensei didn't want people bother the boy further. The moment both ' _Naruto'_ and ' _Tobio'_ vanished was the moment a mysterious doctor appeared showing abilities as a surgeon unheard before now." Tsunade answered.

" _Kurotsune?_ " Kakashi asked reading from the report.

"The name he was given by his first patient, from what Jiraiya told me and sensei, in those ten years the scars-covered boy had become a prodigy in the medical field surpassing even Honma-sensei, but the true turning point had been five years ago when he met Sasuke Uchiha." Tsunade answered.

"The last Uchiha? I thought Orochimaru kidnapped him during the Invasion!"

"His bodyguards did the kidnapping, the so-called ' _Sound Four'_. But the ANBU squad sent to recover the boy managed to intercept them, in the ruckus an heavily wounded Sasuke managed to run away and make himself scarce. Our best hypothesis is that he got found by a member of the ' _Cult of Nen_ ' and got hidden by them."

"Those monks preaching about humans not needing Chakra because to them it ' _pollutes'_ our Life Energy?" Kakashi said surprised.

"Precisely, we can only guess, but everything points at Sasuke-san joining their cult and learning their ways. The fact that Naruto's movements we were tracking from afar also brought him in an area with a strong connection to the Cult also bring us to believe they have met while our wayward Jinchuuriki was curing one of the Cult members." Tsunade answered.

"How can you say that exactly?"

"Because exactly a month later _Kurotsune-Sensei_ gained a bodyguard/assistant and his talent skyrocket...especially after the Mizuki Incident."

"The Mizuki...what do you mean?"

"That man stole the Forbidden Scroll and managed to run away with enough wounds to kill a lesser man, and yet, three months later our Hunter-nins got an anonymous letter and managed to find him in an hovel bandaged and recovering from surgery our medics defined ' _A work of Art';_ the cherry on top was finding the forbidden scroll sitting placidly on a near table with a note apologizing for not notifying us sooner due to his vows as a Medic forcing him to firstly heal Mizuki completely...guess what jutsu was also in there?"

"You mean the **Kage Bunshin no Jutsu?** (Shadow Clone Technique)" Kakashi asked.

"The scroll showed signs of having been opened and Mizuki admitted under torture that as a payment for having his life saved he had let _Kurotsune_ copy few things...one of which the **Kage Bunshin**." the Hokage replied.

"He sold the information?!" the Jounin shinobi asked horrified.

"No from what we could gather, but as I said Naruto's record as a surgeon reached new heights after that, reaching the point of rivaling experienced surgeons twice and even thrice his age." the woman said.

"He had the jutsu and a bodyguard with shinobi training we all hailed as a prodigy, he could still shape chakra in his arms to form seals and so use it...and with the Kyuubi he had enough raw reserves to call an army of those. He must have used that jutsu to further his studies at ten times the normal speed if not more. And in Five years he got to his current level."

"It's our best guess."

"Add to the fact the possibility that Sasuke-san probably also taught him how to focus chakra in his arms and senses to strengthen them and you get a Civilian Surgeon going on par with a Medic-nin...and surpassing them in most cases." Kakashi mussed.

"Insinuating something, Hatake?" the Hokage asked coldly.

"Nothing, Hokage-sama." the other answered immediately.

"My interest in both Sasuke and Naruto is not only for the fact that they are a Jinchuuriki and a **Sharingan** User, mind you. But both had their occasion to shine robbed from them and now that they have flourished outside Konoha and matured from their childish rage against us I hope to rebuild the bridge between us. Especially since the Village really needs all the man power we can gather, that's why I want you to explain them that we need them." Tsunade said.

"It's not an easy mission, Hokage-sama; they had years to develop anger issues against Konoha, especially Naruto. Sasuke may work as an intermediary with him, but if up until now we got no words from him I can't help but have doubts about his willingness to join us as well."

"I suspect the same, that's why I need you to talk with both and convince them to come here to talk, a peaceful talk that won't force them to join us. But tell them we need their joining Konoha, that whatever they want we will give it to them fully plus the tip." Tsunade said sighing.

"Should they refuse?"

"Then we are fucked, plain and simple. Iwa is openly admitting to be ready to forget Naruto is Minato's son in exchange to have him join them together with Sasuke and his eyes, Onoki had promised enough money, resources and shinobi training to drive other Kages green with envy. Kumo has done the same and added a ' _Kill on Sight_ ' order for Itachi ready to be deployed in case of joining their banner for Sasuke and the position as Chairman of their biggest Civilian Hospital for Naruto. Mist too is promising Heaven and Earth to those two to have them join, especially after both helped the revolutionary army of their new Mizukage Mei Terumi by fighting with them and curing their wounded...Everyone wants the " _Last_ _ **Sharingan**_ **"** and that medical talent, Kakashi. Everyone." Tsunade answered groaning.

"We can't force them to stay?" Kakashi asked.

"And YOU would then ask someone you forced to stay that is also that good with a scalpel to operate on a shinobi or a civilian? He seems to know things well enough to easily simulate complications without leaving traces behind leading back to him." Tsunade answered with narrowed eyes.

"Oh! And someone still with issues against shinobi as a whole would easily ignore his values as a doctor and do just that..." Kakashi admitted wincing.

"One can't fuck with the ones preparing their food or curing their wounds, unless that one is an idiot."

"But what about Naruto's training? He may still be able to use jutsus, but he is a civilian doctor and can't focus chakra in his legs or other muscles. He is pretty much Academy Level shinobi-wise!"

"I am sure you can move around the issue, there are ways to make a body strong without focusing chakra in it, at worst he will be the Medic-Nin of the Team staying slightly back while the others deal with the enemy." Tsunade answered helpless.

"And the third member of Team 7?" Kakashi asked.

"The girl is the least problematic, she won't go anywhere. Just focus on recovering Naruto and Sasuke first, you'll meet the girl once the two boys are here."

"I'll see what I can do, Hokage-sama...but it won't be easy, especially since I can't just knock both down and drag them here..." the Jounin answered sighing in defeat.

 **Back to the present – sea -**

Kakashi's musing went interrupted when a subtle swishing sound reached his trained ears making a kunai instinctively slip in his hand from inside his sleeve to deflect the incoming projectile by throwing the blade towards it, to his surprise the kunai went cut in half without stopping the bullet that actually opened a faint cut on his cheek before getting stuck on the boat between the owner's legs.

" _YIKES_!" the old man shrieked at seeing the card stuck at a millimeter from his genitals.

"They know we are here...such a little thing thrown from that distance and with such a strong, opposing wind...impressive." Kakashi said taking the card to inspect it, surprised to see it being a plain common card normally used to play, the ' _Joker'_ to be exact.

"I am going back! I am going back! First is the cards then...then..." the man said before blanching.

"Then what?" Kakashi asked turning back to look at the island to see that the number of projectiles incoming this time had reached the dozen and was still multiplying.

"Ca-ca-CANNONBALLS!" the boat owner shrieked as columns of water started exploding upwards around them.

"He can hit from that distance with a card but misses with a cannonball...he is telling us to turn around and leave." Kakashi said chuckling.

"AND I AM DOING JUST THAT!" the man shrieked as he rapidly turned tail.

"Well, you can go back. But I must go forward. Thank you for taking me here, HAVE CARE!" Kakashi said uncovering his **Sharingan** eye under the eye-patch and dashing forward running on the water.

"A shinobi!? I am dead! If they know I brought him here I AM DEAD!" the boat owner screamed as he gained speed in leaving.

 **With Kakashi -**

" _Uhm!_ He understood I am a shinobi and he is taking away the kids' gloves...good." the man muttered as the projectiles now were deadly accurate making the Jounin dodge their high-speed approach only thanks to his own implanted eye.

" **Sharingan** versus **Sharingan**...let's see who is better." Kakashi muttered highly-amused as he now had to dodge cards, smaller in size and so harder to see.

" _What the?!_ " the man thought in alarm as a scalpel of all things came flying towards him barely an inch from touching water and almost cutting-off his toe.

"A little low, Naruto-kun... _Sniff!_ Aah! There was something on the blade, cunning tactic!" Kakashi said as he saw the green outline of something smeared on his sandal emanating a very acidic smell.

" _I would have dismissed the shallow cut and got poisoned..._ _N_ _o ninja training my ass! Civilian schools don't teach you that!_ _Missing-Nin paying in teachings for operations do instead!_ " the Jounin thought as he watched in dismay his volley of kunais created with the **Kunai Kage Bunshin Jutsu** get tore to pieces by a veritable hail of cards.

"Definitely using clones themselves, I refuse to think just two people can throw all those cards and throwing knives by themselves." he added as cards from the sky and throwing knives ( _scalpels are expensive, Kakashi thought_ ) from the small beach at the base of the island kept targeting him.

"So if I jump I get cut to pieces and if I don't I get poisoned...cheeky bastards. But I am not a Jounin for nothing! **SUITON: SUIRYUUDAN NO JUTSU! (Water Dragon Projectile)** " Kakashi said smirking and summoning a giant roaring dragon of water and launching it towards the direction from which the cards were coming, satisfied to hear the clear explosion of the Jutsu hitting the target.

"AH! I am close enough to retaliate now! What will you do now, eh?" Kakashi said smugly as he stopped to look at the island barely an hundred meters from him.

In answer a MASSIVE Cannonball, easily as big as a small house, went launched at break-neck speed towards him soon casting its huge shadow over the Jounin.

"...And that is why you should NEVER boast about your abilities, kids..." Kakashi said with a deadpan tone as he opened a very ' _Wile Coyote'-_ tiny umbrella above his head while crunching down preparing for the impact.

 _ **KABOOOOOOOOOM!**_ The resulting explosion managed to generate a mushroom cloud big enough to be seen all the way from Konoha making Tsunade instinctively face-palm grumbling.

 **On the Island – cliff surveying the sea -**

A young man with raven-coloured hair tied in a loose ponytail was watching pleased the smoke settle before walking towards the solitary house placed at few meters from where he was.

"Hey! The uninvited guest should have survived the blast and soon reach here, thank you for creating a clone to help me throwing that last ball and...uh?" Sasuke said sighing while entering, stopping dead in his tracks once he saw Kakashi sitting in the waiting room reading a magazine not bothered by his still smoking, slightly ruined clothes.

"YO!" the Jounin said with a cheerful wave and an eye smile, the implanted one already back into being hidden by his eye-patch.

"No smoking." Sasuke answered unimpressed while tapping on the sign near the door.

"Oh! Sorry!" the man replied licking two fingers to smother the small flame still burning on the top of his head.

"SILENCE! I AM OPERATING HERE!" a second voice bellowed furious from behind a double set of doors making both flinch.

"Sorry." Kakashi repeated with a low voice and sheepish expression.

" _Tch!_ " an old lady with expensive-looking clothes sitting near her husband at the opposite side of the room muttered in disdain while reading from her gossip magazine.

"I am going to see if he has done. DO NOT touch anything!" Sasuke said with a glare.

"Okay! Okay! _Sheesh_!" Kakashi said huffing and rising both hands.

In that moment a wheelchair was wheeled out from the aptly-labeled Operating Room showing a young girl with pale complexion being pushed out by a surgeon-dressed young blond man, although half his hair were completely white in color and his face had a patch of black skin cutting his face diagonally in two that had been evidently sew there to repair the damages from the explosion of his childhood.

"KIMIKO! My precious little Kimiko!" the woman yelled as she ran towards the girl with tears in her eyes.

"The operation has been a complete success, the tumor to her colon as been removed without troubles." the medic known as _Kurotsune_ said disinterested.

"They said it was impossible, that the thing had spread too much to completely remove it without killing her!" the girl's father said crying while hugging the girl.

"It had took more than half her colon, yes. I just used the one from a donor we happened to come by and I just transplanted it." the blond answered while taking away the surgical garment to show a red bowtie and an elegant black suit under it.

"He transplanted half a colon from a donor to her?" Kakashi asked surprised.

"He transplanted the _whole_ thing, just in case." Sasuke corrected.

"The twenty million we have talked about. Here!" the girl's father said opening a briefcase filled to the brim with money in front of the blond.

"GUAH?!" the Jounin yelled with bulged-out eyes.

"I guess you never saw all that money in a single place before?" the Uchiha boy said shrugging and taking himself the briefcase to disappear behind one of the other doors of the room.

"Those are the equivalent of five years of nothing but High-profile S-Rank Missions everyday...and he got them in one go..." Kakashi muttered in awe watching the couple wheel their daughter out of the small clinic.

"Keep her under watch, your own personal doctor _should_ be able to keep things under control. Do not waste the result of my work." Naruto said cracking his back with a subtle groan.

"We will, _Kurotsune-sensei_...Thank you." the woman answered with a deep bow before rapidly leaving with her daughter and husband in tow.

"So he reached here?" Naruto asked sighing while taking from a near shelf a pipe and filling it.

"He is good. He has run his way through my Nen-infused cards and your clone's poisoned throwing knives, but I don't get how he escaped the giant cannonball explosion." Sasuke answered taking one of the magazines from the table in front of Kakashi to read it.

"We need to talk. I came in Peace." Kakashi said calmly.

"I suspected as such, otherwise you would have attacked me and my patients as soon as you entered." Naruto said taking a mouthful from his pipe with a relaxed expression before blowing out a dense grey cloud.

"Smoking is bad for your health, for a doctor that would be extra bad." Kakashi said chuckling.

"The Biju I hold can cure my lungs and stop cancer from even start to form, most Medic-nin forget that chakra coils in there are the most resilient thanks to the ribcage protecting the organs, if I can pump chakra in my heart to control its beat then I can channel it into my lungs that are conveniently at both sides of my heart. And so can Kurama the nine-tailed Fox in my Seal." Naruto answered nonplussed.

"Oh!...so his name is Kurama..." Kakashi muttered nodding slowly.

"It takes a Juken strike from the Hyuuga Clan to have a 100% chance of those getting struck and damaged, and that's because their fighting style it's made to do exactly that. An explosion able to do direct damages to those would have also killed him instantly since his torso would have been turned into a gaping hole, his lungs just got damaged by the air pressure of the bomb going off." Sasuke added.

"He is a good assistant." Naruto said smirking.

"I can see that, but I absolutely need to talk with you two." Kakashi said shrugging.

"Can I at least finish smoking? It has been a tiring day, that was my third operation in a row and I started operating last night. Give me five minutes of peace before any talk." the blond answered groaning.

"Me too, staying up all night and play defense system for the house at the same time is tiring." Sasuke added lying on the couch in front of Kakashi.

"And what should I do in those five minutes? Let's hear!" the Jounin said huffing, secretly highly disturbed by the surreal situation he was in.

"Read this, it's the last issue." Naruto said throwing a magazine at Kakashi.

" _Fainting Teen Weekly?_ " the man said out loud.

"There is a nice interview to Hinata Hyuuga explaining how she defeated her fainting spells." Sasuke answered dozing off.

"Ooh! That sounds interesting-GUAH!" Kakashi said opening the first page and gasping in shock as a needle at the end of a spring snapped forward hitting his throat.

"It will make you sleep for a couple of hours, good night." Naruto said with a smug smirk.

"The...old trick of the needle at the end of a spring hidden inside a gossip magazine...how could...I fall for this...old as fuck...cheap shot..." the Jounin groaned with a weak voice before falling forward slamming his head on the table in front of the couch and immediately starting to snore loudly.

"...Good, grab his legs, I want to give a look to his implanted **Sharingan** eye." Naruto said grabbing the man's arms.

" _Sigh!_ But then I want five minutes break, I earned them." the Uchiha boy answered sighing while doing as the other asked.

 **Several hours later – one of the rooms of the small clinic -**

"Uuugh..." Kakashi moaned as he slowly regained consciousness opening his eyes to see he was lying on a bed wearing an hospital gown.

"Slept well?" he heard Naruto ask while leaning on the only table of the small room.

"Wha?" he answered dumbly.

"I opened your head to give a look at your implanted eye, for being something evidently done in a rush, it was very well made." the half blond said lighting his pipe again.

"M-My eye?...My eye...AH!" the Jounin said shocked before touching his face to feel bandages covering half his face.

"Don't worry, the **Sharingan** is still there, I just worked a little on your optical nerve, it was pretty much a mess so I removed the eye and rebuild its nerves to better sustain that kind of eyes, luckily Sasuke had been more than open to be my source of Uchiha knowledge while I was studying the various Bloodline Limits, so once memorized how an ' _Uchiha Optical Nerve'_ looks like I could replicate it with _spare parts_ I took from the same donor that gave me the colon for that girl." Naruto answered.

"The same?" Kakashi said weakly.

"A Missing-Nin, an healthy one named Zabuza Momochi, in exchange of me saving his tool/son Haku after an ambush from a certain Gato he permitted me to use his organs in any way I wish, so I kept some of his organs in stasis for later us. And you are lucky other than the eyes nothing else remained, I already used everything. A killer that after his death saved people in need of a miracle, truly a great man." Naruto answered.

"So my eye...is still in here?" Kakashi asked weakly.

"Yes, you'll just need to remember that now you actually need to activate it like an Uchiha would instead of keeping it always active and just cover it with your hitai-ate.

"T-t-thank you." he said in surprise.

"Don't thank me, I didn't do it out of the goodness of my heart, either you or your Hokage will need to pay me." Naruto answered.

"So you know I come from Konoha..."

"The **Sharingan** is from there, unless in those years I was away some other survivors of that night popped-up, and I gave a look through your stuff while you were out and under his scalpels." Sasuke answered entering the room.

"How much do you want for my surgery?" Kakashi asked.

"I feel generous, so I'll be happy with only twenty million Ryous." the blond answered nonchalantly.

"T-T-T-TWENTY!?" the Jounin shrieked with a girlish scream.

"That or I'll take that very same eye as my payment." the other replied with a fangs-filled grin.

"O-Oooh!..." Kakashi moaned before fainting again.

"Too much anesthetic?" Sasuke asked curious.

"No, you were perfect as usual and gave him the right amount, he just had to over-react at hearing my fee."

"If you ask me, in exchange of keeping the eye that made him famous it was even too cheap as a request." the Uchiha said.

"I know, but I was feeling generous."

"So you will really ask that much?"

"Konoha almost took away my life because their shinobi could not be bothered with healing a boy not coming from a shinobi Clan and their hospital was in the hands of an idiot giving more importance to personal vendettas instead of doing his job an curing people regardless...so I will take from them every cent I can until they'll have repaid from what they took from me. The payment from taking away my parents instead I still have to decide."

" _Sigh!_ Sometimes I fear to see that hate consume you, don't forget that not everyone is culpable of what happened, remember." Sasuke said sighing.

"I know, I know. What do you think?" Naruto asked.

"They have sent one of their best to talk with us, maybe they too want us to join them...we technically ' _belong'_ to them in their own twisted sense of Reality. You have the Kyuubi and I have the ' _Legendary'_ **Sharingan** and can pass it to my children...both former belongings of Konoha."

"So they may try to force us to stay? I have a clinic to run, they'll just try to take Kurama away or relegate me somewhere to work only on patients from Konoha accepting what THEY say should be my fees or even for free and taking those moneys themselves." the half blond answered grumbling.

"And you tell me? They will either force me to impregnate someone willingly or take my sperm by force and grow their new Uchiha Clan in some lab." Sasuke added with a scrunched expression of disgust.

"Actually...Tsunade-sama has recently become the new Hokage and had pretty much stamped-out those kind of ideals." Kakashi said weakly as he once again came back to the awake world.

"You'll have to excuse me if I don't believe to a single word that comes out from your mouth, even should you say the sky is blue I will hold some form of distrust." Naruto answered.

"...I was taught by Minato-sensei and was a Teammate of Obito?" the man tried saying.

"We know that and it doesn't change a thing, you dimwitted fool. We kept asking around about you people while on the run, once asked about details about my Clan's and Naruto's father we may not know about we got your name and Obito's as well from some retired shinobi." Sasuke answered shaking his head.

"Please? Just come to talk with the Hokage, she said she just wants to have a chat, it won't mean forcing you into anything...Come on! I am too used to my perfect score of successes in Missions to start now failing! I pride myself in always succeeding! You can't ruin my reputation!...and I don't have twenty millions to pay for my operation, so you'll have to ask Tsunade-sama to pay for that!" the Jounin asked with a childish whine.

"... _Sigh!_ Ten minutes, we'll give your Hokage ten minutes. But at the first sight of troubles we leave and will never return." Sasuke said.

"I won't come." Naruto said flatly.

"They won't stop pestering us otherwise, and maybe we are still in time to resolve this peacefully before they get the idea of coming here to drag us there by force."

"...I bet they will jump us as soon as we enter and cover us in some sort of Obedience Seal..." the half blond muttered in disdain while leaving the room.

"He has some issues with Konoha..." Kakashi said shocked.

"He hates the place, we always steer clear from everything even just remotely close to that Village. If he is coming is just because I asked and he doesn't want to let me go there alone." Sasuke answered.

"He hates Konoha...but the Village is not filled with idiots! There are good people in there! Just because a man refused to treat him out of jealousy of his father it doesn't mean everyone will treat him badly!"

"Try to explain this to him yourself, I keep failing in having him understand." Sasuke answered leaving the room himself to help his friend pack everything.

"I need to write to Tsunade-sama. She needs to know this..." the man muttered while looking in his pocket for something to write.

"There is some paper and a pen in the waiting room, use that to alert your Hokage of our arrival. At least you will coordinate better the ambush." Naruto said coldly while leaving Kakashi's clothes on a near table.

"He is a desperate case, I'll explain everything and say that we'll be there in a week so to give Tsunade-sama time to be sure no-one will try something. Poor boy."

 **A Week Later – Konoha - Main Gate -**

The trio of Jounin, Medic and Uchiha was slowly walking through the main gate after showing their ID to the two guards, the half blond almost shrinking in the black cloak he was wearing over his black suit.

"Don't you have troubles wearing that with this heat?" Kakashi asked curious.

"It has seals on the inside that help dispersing the excessive heat," Sasuke answered, he was wearing a deep-blue sleeveless shirt with the Uchiha crest on its back, long white pants and black sandals.

"Welcome back home, boys." Tsunade said as she walked-out from a near side street to meet the trio.

"Hokage-sama." Kakashi answered with a bow.

"What happened to your eye?" she asked.

"He fixed it, once removed the bandages I will be able to freely turn it on and off instead of being forced to cover it." the man answered with a small smile.

"I wish to give a look at it if you don't mind...but what happened to your face to have half of it being dark-skinned? I thought one good as you would have substituted that patch of dark skin in an instant..."

"When I had my incident no-one wanted their children to donate skin to heal my face, the only one that did was a young girl from Kumo named Karui that had come to Konoha to see the Village together with an ambassador. That night she ended-up stopping that man from kidnapping the Hyuuga Heiress and was rewarded with a kunai to the stomach, she was in the room next to mine when Honma-sensei came screaming for a skin donor to save my face...she offered hers with no hesitation just because she wanted to help a wounded kid she didn't even know, I am treasuring this skin and for me it is more precious than all the gold of the world." the half blond answered with narrowed eyes.

"I see, I didn't know that." the woman answered with a sad smile.

"It's okay. So you want to talk with us?" Sasuke said.

"I have a good offer to make, but not here. Come to my office and we will talk in peace. No traps, on my honor." Tsunade answered smiling gently.

"I'll hold you on that..."

It was in that moment that a deafening noise followed by a strong shudder of the terrain under their feet called their attention to a near apartment building where a tall cloud of dust was just in that moment starting to settle.

"THE WALL CRUMBLED! THERE ARE WOUNDED!" a near woman screamed in fright.

"Escort the civilians away! Help the wounded!" Tsunade ordered immediately making the near hidden ANBU spring into action to clear the area and assist the victims of the incident.

"What do you think?" Sasuke asked curious.

"Nothing too extreme for the majority of them, those two though risk losing both arms as I can see the bone sticking-out from here... _Sniff!_ I can already feel the start of the gangrene, it's spreading fast." Naruto answered unimpressed.

"You are a trained Medic, help me!" Tsunade said immediately as she approached one ot the two men with broken arms.

"I am also unlicensed as you may already know...Fifty Millions Ryous and I'll save both." the half blond boy answered smirking.

"F-F-FIFTY?!" the Hokage screamed with wide eyes.

"They are your precious Villagers, what is that small price in exchange to save their lives? Even if you save one, the other will at least lose an arm since you can't operate fast enough in those conditions...so?" he answered smiling innocently.

"You...you are disgusting..." Tsunade growled.

"H-H-Help!" the worker asked with a pleading voice.

"Will you pay those twenty-five Millions that are your half of the fee of my services? Even if it will take your whole life?" Naruto asked seriously.

"...Y-Yes! I-I can't let my son alone! He has only me! I need to work to feed him! Just leave me enough pay to feed him and everything else w-w-will be yours!" the man said between clenched teeth from the pain.

"You don't have to do that!" Tsunade said shocked.

" _Shush_! This is my patient you are talking with...Sasuke! I will operate him!" the young man said with a proud expression.

"Good for you, I'll help the others trapped under the fallen pieces of wall n the meantime." the Uchiha boy said unsealing a deck of cards and shuffling it so rapidly to have cards and hands disappear in a blur and covering both in a red aura.

"Ah!" the raven-haired boy yelled launching several projectiles that managed to cut through the pieces of wall like butter making it easier to free the people under them.

"Take them away, I am going to cut the others free as well!" he then said to the men around him.

Meanwhile that was happening, the infamous _Kurotsune-sensei_ was already at work on the trapped man's arms near Tsunade, having unsealed and inflated a giant ' _bubble'_ of plastic and made both him and the Hokage wear sterilized clothes for the operation.

"I took this ' _portable operating room'_ in Iron Country, in there the shinobi are less present so they couldn't take most of the money used to advance their medical discoveries so the civilian medicine in there is leagues forward compared to other countries." he explained.

"Unfortunately I can't argue with that, but in truth is the Daimyo and his men forcing us to do this, if I try to ask for more money to start some research here they get blue in the face as if they are going to get ill." Tsunade answered sighing.

"I see..." the young man answered as his scalpel keep moving at blinding speed.

"Drain!" he then ordered to his **shadow clone**.

"Hai!"

"So you really can use that jutsu." Tsunade said chuckling as her assistant Shizune helped her close the wound on their patient.

"I can mold chakra into techniques, yes. But I can't walk on walls or water nor I can make my legs move faster or turn the rest of my body tougher to sustain attacks, at best I can become a glass cannon, and I prefer being a Medic instead." the half blond answered.

" **Henge? Substitution?** "

"Never tried."

"Are you open to learn Medic-nin techniques?" she asked curious.

"I feel more at ease in using a scalpel and my other instruments, I am sorry."

"I never said you would have to stop using them, but an extra trick or two under your belt would help in the long run; as long as you can focus chakra in your arms you would still be able to use them."

"But I would be dead weight in a Mission." Naruto answered mockingly.

"I am sure I can come-up with ways to resolve that issue." Tsunade said with a smug smile.

"Don't talk as if I accepted to stay. Operation completed." he answered getting up.

"Already? You work fast." Shizune said surprised.

"It wasn't as hard as it looked. Hey, Sasuke! A card here! I need to drag him out!"

"Me too, I have finished as well!" Tsunade said.

"Heads down!" the Uchiha boy answered cutting the pieces of wall and bars of iron over the two men to pieces in an instant.

"...Hey." Tsunade said as two stretches were wheeled near the two patients to take them away.

"Uh-hu?"

"Will you really have him pay twenty-five millions Ryou? He will never pay that..." the woman asked sighing, gasping in shock when said man gave an angry yell.

"Stay out of this, Hokage-sama! I will pay the fee, no matter what! He said I will be able to return to work once healed and I will pay for his work! He made possible for me to keep hugging my son, that's more important to me than some money..." he said wheezing in fatigue.

"Well said...hey, is this yours?" Naruto asked before grabbing a piece of paper from the ground that had fell from the man's pocket.

"Oh, that? It's a coupon for two free bowls of ramen at Ichiraku, I won them yesterday and planned to use them today with my pal here...but then the wall fell on us, hehehe!" he answered with a weak laugh.

"Free ramen...I love that dish and a coupon for two free bowls is worthy even more than twenty-five millions for someone like me, you know?" the half blond muttered with a meaningful look.

"T-Thank you..." the wounded worker muttered with grateful tears as he was carefully moved towards the hospital by the Medics in the area.

"You ask for a ton of money but then accept a coupon...I don't get it." Tsunade said snorting as she, her assistant and the two boys returned to walk towards the Hokage Tower.

"I want my patients to show the Will to live, even against impossible odds like death or a mere too-high-fee. If there is no Will behind it then all the healing of the doctor will be for nothing."

"As soon as that man dismissed the price for the joy of just being alive to hug his son again he showed that nothing was more important to him than staying with his family, Naruto here tends to dismiss the jerk facade in front of that. But do not tell this to the others, if the client can afford those money we WILL get paid that sum, no matter what we'll have to do." Sasuke added.

"Aye-aye, I got it. Now come, I'll introduce you to the third member of our group, then I will spend several hours trying to have you three become the new Team 7. And I fear that it will cost me and Konoha a lot to have you three say yes." Tsunade answered sighing in defeat.

"Good luck with that!"

"Where is this supposed third member?" Sasuke asked.

"We are going there, Sakura Haruno is her name and she is staying in the psychiatric ward of our Shinobi Hospital, their guest in there ever since she tore the head off of that poor bastard of her father six years ago, the man had sold her and the rest of family to Orochimaru for his experiments when she was three and she didn't like that one bit. I promised her freedom in exchange of joining Team 7 and Kunoichi training, she answered that she would have accepted only after meeting the other two members...meaning you two." the Hokage answered smirking.

"Uh...did I tell anything about coming here being a bad idea?" Sasuke asked with a raised eyebrow.

"No, and I am regretting not putting my foot down hard enough to convince you to ignore their request." Naruto answered sighing.

"Don't be like that, I am sure we will be a wonderful Team!" Kakashi said rejoining the group once recovered his usual attire.

"I knew this was going to be a bad day...I just knew it..." Naruto muttered in dismay.

 **SO! HERE IT IS.**

 **This is the first chapter of the new version. Don't get strange ideas, it won't be updated any time soon and will just take the place of " _Strongest Team under the Heavens"_ and join the OP corner once the old version gets removed as advertised.**

 **OP Corner story meaning 5000/6000 words-long chapters only, this one being an exception.**

 **Next chapter will obviously focus more on Sakura and Sasuke's abilities as THEY are the fighting components of Team 7 while Naruto will stay on the back and be the Medic.**

 **I hope this is a better version, if this too fails I am throwing in the towel and admit defeat, because it would mean I can't do a story like this yet.**

 **See you around the net.**

 **Tr230**


	2. Chapter 2

**Second Chapter, Soon I'll finally get my annual, _short_ period of "less work" and it should make updates faster...Hopefully. **

**To be clear:**

 **Naruto is similar to ' _Black Jack'_ of Osamu Tezuka's manga, similar back-story and slightly better as a surgeon for reason I'll explain later in the story.**

 **Sakura is using the symbiont Venom.**

 **Sasuke is a Nen-User, unsure if making him more similar to _Isaac Netero_ or _Kurapika_ power-wise. I am open to suggestions.**

" **You bastard"** \- demon talking / jutsu

"Let's finish this" - dialogue

" _Can it get any worse?_ " - during flashback/Thoughts

 **Pairing: Sasu/Saku**

 **Naru/...Help? What about Samui?**

 **Chapter 2: The Mad girl.**

 **Konoha – underground Asylum -**

The unofficial Asylum of Konoha, ' _unofficial'_ so to speak as it was merely away from public eyes, was hidden underground near one of the offices of the T&I Department ( _that too located under the_ _street_ _level_ ) and connected through a series of long tunnels to the Hospital so to answer to emergency situations; and just like with the Torture Department, at the time of the _Birth_ of Konoha it had been decided to hide the building where the civilians could not see it just to better attract new people in the newly-developed Konoha with the idea of the Leaf Village not needing such structures to exist.

At present though, in one of the tunnels were now walking Tsunade Senju the Hokage, Hatake Kakashi and both Naruto and Sasuke as they followed a squad of Medics towards the underground mental hospital.

"So she is crazy?" Kakashi asked curious.

"Yes and no; she refers to herself as ' _We',_ implying that whatever experiment Orochimaru did on her separated her mind in two parts, but exception made for bouts of anger and violence she is perfectly capable of interact with the outside world. As long as no-one talks about what happened to her and her family of course." Tsunade answered simply.

"Anything else?" Naruto asked while reading the girl's file in poorly-concealed lack of interest.

"Isn't he _Kurotsune-sensei?_ " one of the medics whispered to his colleagues.

"Yeah, I wonder why this butcherer is here." the other answered sneering.

"I may not have a License, but I still have good ears and knowledge about how to make your deaths painful while still looking natural." the young man said chuckling darkly and making the two medics fall silent with a violent shiver.

"Ignore them. I want you two to talk to her and convince her to be the third member of Team 7, if you can't I will let you two go and never again bother you. But I want an honest try." the Hokage said sighing.

"And if we manage?" Sasuke asked with narrowed eyes.

"I will respect the accord we have and you will get what you wanted in exchange, no string attached and no brain-wash." Tsunade promised.

"Tch!" the half-blond young man answered unconvinced.

"At least _pretend_ to be considering the offer... _"_ Kakashi said with a dead-pan tone.

"Here we are," one of the doctors said opening the lonely metallic door connecting to the facility to show a long corridor of doors and the padded rooms behind those.

"There she is, Haruno Sakura: Room 731." Tsunade said pointing at the right door.

"...It's empty." Sasuke said confused as he spied from the small window in reinforced glass of the door.

"The ceiling." the Hokage answered as a shadow dropped down abruptly to let a pink-haired girl with green eyes wearing a straight-jacket lock her gaze with the Uchiha heir one.

"EEEEK!" the young man shrieked jumping back making her laugh uproariously.

"I thought chakra was suppressed in there." Naruto asked curious.

"It is, she can walk on any surface by herself; along producing webs from the back of her fists, sense danger before-hand and posses inhuman-levels of agility...Along _That_." Tsunade answered.

"That?"

 _BANG! CRASH!_

" **HELLO THERE, BOYS!"** the girl growled with a feral tone of voice as her skin turned completely black, her eyes became two big white spots and her mouth went filled with sharp teeth and a very long tongue; as soon as she head-butted the small glass to pieces she ducked back inside to evade the scalpel and card both boys threw at her.

"Uuuh! Feisty!" Sakura said smiling happily as her body returned to normal and shat cross-legged on the floor.

"Bitch." Sasuke answered groaning in annoyance.

"Ufufufu! Interesting mutation," Naruto added as he walked closer to the door.

"Do you like? We take pride in our looks!" the girl said as she walked towards him with a slow swaying of her hips.

"I do love both versions...Might I be so bold to ask to look closer?"

"Uuuhm! What do I get in exchange?"

"A kiss to the cheek?" the half blond answered making the others splutter.

"Oh-Oooh! Dirty boy! Whatever, take your look." Sakura said shocking the others by bending forward and making the veins on her face bulge out along her pupils shrinking to almost disappear.

" _ **GRAAAAAAAAAH!**_ " she roared as the straight-jacket literally _exploded_ as her arms tore it to pieces as soon as she forcefully flexed her muscles.

"What the?!" the doctors shrieked, but before they could intervene Tsunade stopped them and opened the door.

"No funny businesses, young lady." the Hokage hissed with narrowed eyes.

"We'll be good." she answered chuckling as Naruto gently grabbed her hand.

"Pulse is slightly accelerated...Pupils react normally...Sweating ratio too seem normal, muscles though seem denser...You are tense." the black-dressed doctor said calmly.

"You don't say." Sakura answered not looking at him in the eyes.

"What was that black stuff covering you?" he asked.

"That's Venom, part of us; we are both Sakura and Venom, we are one." she answered.

"A symbiotic life-form then? What does he eat?"

"Whatever we eat; we share body, Stamina and food; Venom gets food and a body to live in and Sakura gets a power-up." she answered grimacing.

"I see, no chance of taking it away?"

" **No, the Snake bastard fused us. He wanted to create a new Bloodline.** " the girl answered with the right half of her face turning black and monstrous.

"Sorry if I asked. Thank you for leaving me check on you." Naruto answered turning away to walk out.

"HEY! Where's our kiss?" she said pouting.

"Ufufufufu! How could I forget!" he said daintily covering his mouth with an hand before turning back to look at her.

"Will you join Team 7 with them?" Tsunade asked with crossed arms.

"Tell you what, Hokage-sama? We'll make an effort to know them better...Your kisses are damn wet, blond-kun!" Sakura answered before glaring at the half-blond.

"Ufufufu! It must be, considering the sleeping drugs I covered my lips with when I turned my back." the unlicensed doctor answered chuckling.

"Ooh...You cheeky bastard...I like ya, but that stuff doesn't work on u- _ **THUD!**_ " the pink-haired girl said amused before falling down face-first on the padded floor to snore loudly.

"I tested it on two Jinchuuriki, I _KNOW_ how to create something able to circumvent the Biju's ability to purge the human body, I guess your Symbiont worked the same and tried my luck." Naruto answered shaking his head.

"And it worked, it is the first time I see narcotics work on her." Tsunade admitted with a pleased smile.

"Two?" Kakashi asked curious.

"One was a girl from Kumo that acted as Patient Zero, the other was himself for fine-tuning." Sasuke whispered in answer.

"How long will she be out?" the Hokage asked.

"A couple of hours hopefully, but not knowing how Venom works, I cannot say."

"Let's bring her to my office, we will talk there as soon as she wakes up."

"Yes, Hokage-sama!" the medics answered.

"Then have someone bring lunch in there as well, something tells me we will have LOTS to talk about." Sasuke added sighing.

 **Several hours later – Hokage Tower – Tsunade's Office -**

"Unnngh!" finally stirring awake Sakura looked around to find herself tied to a chair in front of Tsunade while sitting between the two boys, her hospital gown gone in favour of a red shirt and black skin-tight shorts.

"Good Evening," Naruto said with a small bow of his head.

"Slept well?" Sasuke asked curious.

"Our mouth taste like sewage..." she moaned pitifully in answer.

"Yes, I still can't resolve that particular down-side." the half-blond answered regretful.

"YOU DRUGGED US, ASSHOLE!" she screamed as soon as she recovered her focus.

"Just in case you were not cooperative."

"WE WERE! What's your problem?!" she shrieked.

"Trusting issues," the Uchiha boy answered calmly.

"And you work with him?! HOW?!" she asked shocked.

"He pays well, medical bills are not an issue and he is even too much clean, as a roommate, he is perfect." Sasuke answered shrugging.

"He...He didn't do anything strange while we were unconscious...Right?" she whispered worried.

"He-"

"I did."

"WHAT?!" Sakura bellowed with wide eyes.

"I probed around your vagina, played insertion games with your sphincter, carefully touched your breasts and the area around it, took a look inside your mouth while playing with your tongue and generally touched you everywhere...Eyes comprised." Naruto answered with a tiny, evil and satisfied smile.

"KYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAH!" Sakura screamed in horror as she tried to back away.

"RAPE! SEXUAL HARASSMENT! MOLESTATION! PERVERT!" she kept yelling at random while wildly shaking her head.

"What he means," Tsunade said groaning and stopping the girl mid-way in her full-body transformation into Venom.

"Eh?"

"What he means, is that he helped me to give you a full medical check-up." the Hokage said scratching her eyes tiredly.

"EH!?" the girl said again while looking at the half-blond sitting at her right.

"In order: Gynecological check-up, checking your temperature, looked for infections of the mammary glands (Your left breast shows beginner signs of it, remember me to give you your prescription), dentist check AND we gave a look at your tonsils; we also checked your muscles in case they were atrophic from your continuous wearing a straight-jacket and I checked your eyes in case malnutrition from the poor hospital food and your breaking glass with your forehead had done damages to your sight." Naruto answered amused.

"Couldn't...Couldn't you just say it like that?" Sakura asked with a more mollified tone.

"My sense of humor is on the ' _Jerk'_ Side. But if you think about it, I pretty much answered your question honestly the first time as well."

"But with the worst choice of words possible, dobe." Sasuke added shaking his head.

"My apologies." the other answered with a tone not even close at sounding sorry.

"So you saw our..." A madly blushing Sakura asked with a low voice.

"Vagina? Yes. It was a moment in which we were Medic and Patient, so be at ease as I never had dirty thoughts while checking you." Naruto answered with a small, smug smile as he opened a can of juice to drink from it.

"But you didn't..."

"Yes, he had to spread it open, it's part of the procedure." Tsunade answered with a very amused expression.

"Oh." the girl said with her face getting even redder.

"We'll have only female doctors then next time, to make it less embarrassing." Sasuke offered grabbing her shoulder.

"Thank you." she muttered.

"...Ehm..."

"Yes?" Naruto said curious.

"You did not feel a thing? Nothing?" Sakura asked.

"I am a professional, I can ignore my ' _Male Instincts'_ and focus on the task at hand when I work." he answered while sounding almost insulted.

"Yours is not the first one he sees either, so you have nothing he doesn't already know very well." Sasuke added smirking.

"And what about you?"

"I assist in a minor way during surgery and mostly act as a guard for our small clinic, so unless it's something particularly difficult, I wait outside, so I didn't see a thing in your case."

"Good, good we are happy...Anything to add on your side?" she asked.

"Just remember to shave there, your legs and your armpits once we are done here; there was a lot of hair, very antigenic." Naruto answered as an after-thought.

 _ **THUD!**_

"You are despicable." Tsunade said groaning at watching the pink-haired girl topple forward dragging her chair down with her in a dead faint of shame an instant after the young man answered her question.

"I didn't appreciate the scare she gave us when we were visiting her room, this was my pay-back." he answered nonplussed.

"She will be pissed once she wakes-up." Sasuke said amused.

"The price of revenge," his friend answered shrugging uncaring.

"By the way, as soon as she will wake-up again, I think we'll need to go through the details of what it will cost me to have you three become the new Team 7." Tsunade said accepting the dish of sake the boys offered her.

"Tell me again, how did you others talked me into accepting?" Naruto asked groaning.

"A seal array done by Jiraiya the Sannin in person branded on your legs to make chakra flow there and give you back the option of being a ninja." Sasuke answered.

"That and the freedom to continue your practice here along the transportation of your whole clinic in an area of your choosing and I will personally make sure no-one will try to impose on you OR take your money...All that along a bit of ninja training." Tsunade added.

"And for me, the WHOLE Uchiha district turning into an important historical site, their Jutsu to call my own along whatever remains of their fundings (if you greedy people didn't already seize-up everything) and Sharingan Training from Kakashi-sensei...Along other small things both me and Naruto here may come up with at a later date...I think it's a decent payment for our services." the Uchiha Heir said smugly.

"I think I will put my Clinic at the entrance of the Forest of Death, just to discourage the less willing idiots from bothering me,"

"And here I thought I could forget acting as a guard..." Sasuke said whining.

"I'll have some ANBU helping you, just to lesser your troubles." Tsunade offered with a gentle smile.

"Thank you...What will you offer to Sakura instead?"

"As soon as your friend will stop making her lose consciousness, we'll see what she wants." the woman answered glaring at Naruto, growing even angrier at seeing his lack of reaction at her gaze.

 **The next day – Akimichi BBQ Restaurant -**

In the far back corner of the restaurant owned by the chubby ninja clan, the various Chuunin that had composed the various Teams during the Invasion of Suna and Oto were slowly gathering for a ' _secret'_ meeting between friends/colleagues to talk and gossip about the latest piece of news that was already circulating through the Village.

"So they finally assembled a new Team 7?" Kiba Inuzuka asked while petting his huge dog companion Akamaru sitting near him with its head on his lap.

"Uh-hu! So I heard my father say, at least; apparently Tsunade-sama had waited until she managed to track-down two particular boys for the Team, that's why she always refused up until now to re-create it." Ino Yamanaka answered while tossing back a fringe of her long blond hair.

"And the girl? Who's she?" Chouji Akimichi asked in-between mouthfuls of meat.

"I think they asked Sakura-chan." Ino answered.

"Poor girl, her father destroyed her family. But at least now she gets to be free from the Hospital." Tenten Higurashi answered sighing while still toying with a kunai waiting for her order.

"I heard her wounds were most grievous, no-one ever saw her after Orochimaru's escape." Neji Hyuga said unconcerned.

"Mostly was the shock the reason, the trauma of what happened had her live in segregation, so father said." Shino Aburame explained with a plain tone.

"So she was home-schooled? I never saw her at the Academy." Hinata Hyuga asked curious.

"That and a crash-course on what she lacks, so I heard at least." Shikamaru Nara answered yawning.

"I wonder who are the two boys that were asked to be part of Team 7..." Tenten muttered.

"YOSH! Me and Gai-sensei know who they are!" Rock Lee said with his usual excited tone.

"Really?" Kiba asked skeptical.

"But of course! Gai-sensei had been called to help Kakashi-san and Kurenai-san to help revise their knowledge and create a training regimen for them!" the young Taijutsu Fanatic answered with fiery eyes.

"That explains why Kurenai-sensei had cut our training short..." Hinata muttered in surprise.

"I heard they managed to have Kurotsune-sensei come to Konoha as well," a waitress, another Akimichi Clan member, said bringing new plates.

"Even that quack is here?" Kiba asked snorting.

"...What do you think? Would he need both kidneys to live as a ninja instead of just one? Or will it hinder his future?" a voice asked in cold amusement.

"Eh?" the Inuzuka boy choked-out.

"Uuuhm! Hard to say, we never had the chance to try it and see, but as he clearly doesn't show to be using a brain and leaving all the thinking to his dog, I am open to think that he will be okay even should you remove both." another answered chuckling.

"We know nothing about Medicine, but we think it would be fun to see you tore a kidney out of his nose!" a girl's voice added laughing.

"HOY! Are you talking about me?!" Kiba growled as he got to his feet to march towards the table near the Chuunin group and lift one of the guys sitting there by the collar of his coat.

It was in that moment that Kakashi, Kurenai, Gai and Asuma choose to enter the restaurant themselves to find the two young man glare at each other.

"Ooh! I see you met Team 7! What do you think, guys, you like them? The one Kiba is trying to strangle is even a famous Doctor," Kakashi said with an eye-smile.

"A doctor?" Kiba asked curious while still holding Naruto by the front of his coat.

 _Sigh!_ "Yes, Kiba." Kurenai answered with a tired sigh.

"Who would in his right mind make you a doctor? Your face is a single giant stitch!" the Inuzuka said laughing.

"Bad move." Sasuke muttered grimacing.

 _GULP!_

"Wha?"

It was a moment, the instant Kiba wondered what the half-blond had swallowed, that the guy he was trying to choke spat a thick liquid on his face making him let-out a loud scream of agony and bend down to clean his burning eyes.

Barely a second later the other Chuunin jumped to their feet in fighting position; Sakura covered both arms in a black tar-like substance before launching several bullets of webs to glue both Shikamaru and Chouji to their seats; Sasuke in the meantime had plunged both hands in the back pockets of his pants to take-out two full deck of cards, infusing them in energy and throwing them immediately after forcing both Hinata and Neji to enact a small _**Kaiten**_ to protect themselves.

Not one to be left out, Naruto spat again on his hands covering them in the same black substance he had used on Kiba to grab Akamaru's face to shove the dog aside making it howl in pain while using his coat to deflect the Kunai Tenten threw him while charging her with a strong shoulder tackle that launched her back; the doctor not even noticing Ino's mental attack as Kurama the Kyuubi personally taught her how _**BAD**_ that move was as the girl slumped down the floor shrieking in fear.

"OKAY, NOW! STOP!" the Jonin present yelled as one stopping the action abruptly.

"They started it," Sakura answered as she was still holding on Chouji and Shikamaru's heads with a strong grip making the boys grimace in discomfort.

"You did something to Kiba!" Hinata answered while still glaring at Sasuke and at the shining cards the Uchiha boy held at her and Neji's throats and somehow drawing a thin line of blood from their flesh from the close contact.

"It was just an irritating agent, the equivalent of pepper-spray Civilian women use as self-defense; just don't touch the affected area, make him blink rapidly to cause the eyes to tear up, wash the skin with a cleansing solution, such as hand soap, shampoo or even dish soap, and rinse with water; otherwise use a ' _no tears_ ' baby shampoo to help rinse the pepper spray from the eye area. And more important still, _**Teach. Him. Manners.**_ " th half-blond answered nonplussed as he washed his mouth with some water and spitting the remaining black stuff inside a vase.

"Where did you take that irritating agent?" Asuma asked as the members of the various Teams slowly broke apart while Shino helped Kiba and Akamaru to the bathroom to clean their eyes.

"Several teeth in my mouth are _defacto_ fake, since the explosion that scarred me launched me up in the air my landing pulverized half of them, so, since I needed porcelain fakes, I modified them so that each one contained a different super-condensed quality of chemicals; whenever I need, I dislodge one and break the tiny sealing array on the base of it to release the content. Single use only, of course all stuff I have immunity against." Naruto explained unsealing a bag filled with human teeth, choosing one and wincing a little while relocating it on the back of his mouth.

"Chemicals?" Tenten asked taken aback.

"Poisons, pepper-spray-like ones, truth serums, pain-numbing medicines, adrenaline mixtures, narcotics, hallucinogens, neurotoxins, paralyzing agents...You name it, one of his teeth has it inside, and he can either do that or focus chakra on them to unlock the hidden needle on the tip so to inject the stuff with a bite." Sasuke explained.

"How did you..."

"Seal Masters are awfully expensive, but they are worth every cent when they manage to draw such a tiny seal on something as small as human teeth." Naruto answered smirking.

"Naruto-kun is the Medic, interrogator and chemical expert of Team 7; we are the Heavy hitter, tracker and Tank, and Sasuke-kun here is the scout, long-range fighter and all-rounder of the trio." Sakura explained smugly.

"You are already considered a Medic?" Shino asked as he and a red-eyed Kiba rejoined the scene.

"Pretty much." he answered grabbing Kiba's face to peel his eyelids down a little.

"H-Hey!"

"...Good, no damages. You'll just keep tearing-up for a while, but you'll be fine." the half-blond said satisfied.

"Let's go, we still have lots of training to do." Kakashi said motioning his Team to follow him.

"Aye, sensei." the three said as one and soon leaving the restaurant.

"..."

"Who the hell was that guy?" Kiba finally asked aloud.

"So that is Kurotsune-sensei, I imagined him to be older." Asuma said chortling.

"Tsunade-sama confirmed him being the real deal," Kurenai answered shaking her head with an helpless shrug.

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEH?!" the assembled Chuunin yelled as one in shock.

 **In the meantime – with Kakashi -**

"You made a scene." the masked Jonin said sighing.

"And?"

"Can you two at least try to care?" he answered groaning.

"We don't think we did anything wrong, the dog boy acted all insulted because we said he was an idiot while he believed to be free to insult everyone around him without repercussions...If you ask us that was hypocrisy and warranted a lesson." Sakura said shrugging.

"Be as you say, those guys are your ' _Colleagues'_ so you should try befriend them instead of being antagonizing." Kakashi answered as the Team entered their designated Training Ground.

 _Sigh!_ "Okay, I promise I will try to." Naruto said in defeat.

"Me too." Sasuke added unconvinced.

"Good. Shall we have a little warming-up before starting a new round of Training?" Kakashi said closing his book with a snapping motion to pocket it.

"Yes, sensei!" the trio answered as one.

"Good! Naruto? Weights off!"

"Okay." the half-blond answered taking away his coat and letting it fall on the ground.

 _ **KRABOOOM!**_ An imposing explosion and a crater was the result of the thick garment hitting the ground as the weighted coat kept sinking in the ground for a little before finally stopping.

"Arms and legs too?" he asked.

"Not yet, I first want to see how you move like that." Kakashi answered pleased.

"Sasuke, no cards, pure conjuration. You won't use the **Sharingan,** but strengthen your eyes through _**Nen**_."

"Yes." the Uchiha answered as his hands lighted-up in energy soon condensing into a full deck of dull-grey cards along making his eyes gain a faint light for just an instant before dissipating.

"And us?" Sakura asked pouting.

"Full body transformation, _First_ _Form._ " the teacher answered with an eye-smile.

"YAY!" the pink-haired girl yelled happily as the same tar-like stuff covered her whole body to cover her in a skin-tight full-body-suit with two wide spots in the eyes area.

"Aaah! I love this Team, it helps keeping me in shape!" Kakashi said elated as his implanted **Sharingan** eye went uncovered.

"I was of the idea you were a lazy man." Sasuke said stretching.

"I buried too many friends, being lazy was no longer an option. Start attacking with intention to kill, I'll tell you when to stop!"

"And the training?" Sakura asked.

"I'll tell you later, now is warm-up! **KATON: KARYUU ENDAN! (Fire Element: Fire Dragon Flame Missile)"** the masked Jonin answered running through hand-seals as fast as he could and taking in enough air to make his chest swell to inhuman sizes before blowing-out an awe-inspiring _ocean_ of white-hot flames incinerating everything in its path.

"Scatter!" Naruto yelled as three blurs moved in different direction to evade the attack.

 **Meanwhile – not too far away -**

The other Chuunin of the existing Teams of Konoha were huddled together to watch the transformed Sakura leap in the air after bending her back in a way no normal human (or Ninja) could and launching twin strings of web from her fists at both sides of Kakashi so to pull herself towards him knee-first.

"Good strategy, but too slow. We'll work on your speed." Kakashi answered cartwheeling away letting the attack hit the ground demolishing a good portion of the floor.

"She acts similar to a spider..." Shino muttered curious as he watched her go on all four to jump away.

"Where is Sasuke-kun?" Ino asked confused.

"AH-HA!" In answer Kakashi launched himself down on the ground to evade several conjured cards that had appeared out of thin air behind him, making the spying teens shriek as several of them went very close at hitting them.

"That must be your _**In**_ trick, yeah?" the Jonin said launching a volley of kunai back forcing Sasuke to jump down of a near tree while throwing even more _Nen Cards_ back to intercepting the flying knives.

"And where is...THERE!" the scarecrow intoned happily as a thick purple cloud went blown towards him by the half-blond hiding at the opposite side of the Uchiha.

"Poison?" he asked amused.

"No, I don't want you dead. That was an aphrodisiac." Naruto answered smirking.

"Good thing you missed then!" Kakashi answered chuckling.

"Who said I missed..."

"Uh?"

" _ **GIVE US YOUR PENIS!**_ " Sakura bellowed with a demonic roar as she tried to pounce on the Jonin.

"THAT'S CRUEL AND UNUSUAL!" Kakashi shrieked as the girl managed to take an hold of his pants with he webs.

"She will be angry after this." Sasuke said presenting his arm to the Doctor.

"Worth it. The usual?" Naruto answered.

"Yes please."

" _ **Beast Drug!**_ " Naruto said biting Sasuke's arm making the Uchiha's veins immediately bulge-out and his pupils widen.

"GRAAAAAAAAAAH!" the raven-haired Nen User roared as his muscles as well started to swell.

"Remember, my formula lasts thirty minutes, any more and it will cause you to get addicted."

"Don't worry! YAAAAAAAH!" Sasuke answered as his sprint caused the ground under him to explode.

"He said to attack with the intend to kill...Sexual assault and mauling are close seconds," the half-blond muttered smirking as he gave a strong bite to his lips to inject himself with the same drug.

"DAMN IF IT FEELS GREAT!" he bellowed as he too joined the others.

"What the?!"

"It must be a combat drug of some kind," Shikamaru answered thoughtful.

"Drugs?" Ino said worried.

"He said that he gave him a small dose so to not have him get addicted; it sounds like the one my Clan uses." Kiba added while he and the others watched as now attack power and speed of the two boys now seemed to have grown tenfolds.

"Between that horny girl and those two, Kakashi-san looks hard-pressed now..." Lee said as now Kakashi looked more focused in dodging instead of amused.

"...Considering that Sakura-san managed to get Kakashi-san's pants off...I too would be nervous..." Hinata admitted blushing.

"I wasn't even aware they made _Icha-Icha-Themed_ boxers," Tenten added laughing.

Sad to say, Kakashi's image did take a bit of a blown as he was now dodging left and right with only his boxers on as the three kept assaulting him from every angle.

"HEEEEEELP! RAPE! SUCCUBUS!" Kakashi yelled as Sakura managed to pin him down while holding his arms blocked by the wrists.

" _ **GIVE US A KISS!**_ " Sakura growled with a flick of her now several-inches-longer tongue.

"KYYYYYAH!" the man replied sinking into the ground before resurfacing several meters away to re-take his fighting stance.

"Using the **Doton: Shinjū Zanshu no Jutsu (Earth Release: Double Suicide Decapitation Technique)** as an escape tactic now?" Sasuke asked with a feral smirk.

"Extreme solutions are fair in this thing!" Kakashi answered finally recovering his pants to wear them.

"If you say so..."

"No more cards, Sasuke-kun?" Kakashi asked with a sing-song voice.

"It's tiring to continuously create them."

"You instead..." the Jonin said disappointed.

"Yes?" Naruto asked uninterested while lighting-up his pipe and sitting on a rock.

"You kept standing aside...Fight me." Kakashi said crossing his arms.

"Okay. CATCH!" the half-blond answered throwing the pipe to the masked man.

"Ah!" barely dodging in time the Jonin watched as the small object exploded into a thick cloud of smoke.

"He smokes a smoke bomb?" Kiba asked.

"It was a diversion," Ino answered hissing angrily.

"Ah!"

"OKAY! OKAY! I THINK THIS IS...Enough?" Kakashi was heard saying before his tone abruptly fell into uncertainly as a card was at his throat, an obviously-poisoned scalpel was pointing at his heart...and Sakura had once again took of his pants and was holding his ankles down and smirking evilly while looking all the way up at him with FAR TOO MANY SHARP TEETH appearing in her smile.

"You sure? You seem ready for more..." Sasuke said smirking.

"We won't judge, sensei. Want us to leave you two alone for a couple of hours?" Naruto added with a cruel smile.

"We are legal and we lack gagging reflex." Sakura added winking.

"You are drugged..."

"That aphrodisiac was too bland for her body, so it lasted only ten minutes with her metabolism." the half-blond answered.

"But...But..."

"We found fun to see you squirm so we were just pretending." Sakura said amused.

"But...But..."

"Admit it, for all your bravado you are scared of pushy girls." Sasuke said.

"B-B-BUT..."

"It's okay, Sensei. We don't think you are any less of a man..."

"GO FUCKING FUCK YOURSELVES!" the Jonin answered literally blowing his Team back with the volume of his scream and stomping away in rage.

"Something we said?" Sakura asked curious.

"SCREW YOU!"

"...Definitely something we said." the pink-haired girl said nodding.

"Oh, well." Naruto answered shrugging.

"We'll use those guys spying on us instead," Sasuke offered making the hiding Chuunin start sweating.

"Fair to us! Give us the proper version of that Sex Drug! We want to see how much we can make Doggie Boy and the Broody Hyuga scream!" Sakura said cackling.

"Oh, God...That cannot be my Fate..." the up-until-now silent Neji muttered with wide scared eyes.

"As you wish...On three?" Naruto asked.

"Fuck Yeah!"

"Okay." Sasuke said cracking his neck.

"ONE!"

"No..." the Hidden Chunin intoned.

"TWO!"

"No-no-noo!"

"THREE!" the half-blond said as with a simultaneous scream of ' _Self Training!'_ they launched themselves at the spies.

"FUUUUUUUUCK!" the others howled as they started run in the opposite direction to escape them.

"...They did that on purpose." Tsunade said sighing as she and Jiraiya came out from the tree they were hiding in to watch the chase unfold.

"Probably." the Toad Sage admitted chuckling.

"What do you think?"

"I think that _MAYBE_ the Toads may have a solution for his chakra problem, but until I put him through Sage Training I cannot say; but he has an attitude a little cold for my tastes, I would have preferred him more... _Playful_ , to be honest."

"So you don't feel up to it?" the Hokage asked crossing her arms.

"I never said that, hime. I think I can try instead; what about you?" Jiraiya asked back.

"Sakura seems a good candidate for the Slug Summoning Contract and my strength-enhancing technique...I still have to see her aptitude for the _**Seal**_ of the Slugs, but I will let Katsuyu decide." she answered.

"Medical Training?"

"More Naruto's thing, I think. HE is a Civilian Medic already so he already has half the needed knowledge."

"A pity Orochimaru had to be a bastard and take away the Snake Summoning Contract..." the Toad Sage admitted grumbling.

"We'll find a good alternative...We are not in a rush now." Tsunade said waving him off while both slowly walked back towards the Hokage Tower.

"They look like a nice Team of Freaks, all things considered." he said smirking.

"I think that ' _Shinobi'_ and ' _Freak'_ go hand-in-hand nowadays, you old pervert." she answered snorting.

"Too true, Hime...Too true."

 **A new Chapter! YAAAAAY!**

…

 **I don't know how I did it, but I managed to finish it, I am impressed of myself.**

 **Is this story worth the effort?**

 **I don't know! XD**

 **BYEEE!**

 **Tr230.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Third Chapter.**

 **I am getting really slow in updating my stories, sorry about that.**

 **To be clear:**

 **Naruto is similar to ' _Black Jack'_ of Osamu Tezuka's manga, similar back-story.**

 **Sakura is using the symbiotic creature Venom.**

 **Sasuke is a Nen-User, unsure if making him more similar to _Isaac Netero_ or _Kurapika_ power-wise. I am open to suggestions.**

" **You bastard"** \- demon talking / jutsu

"Let's finish this" - dialogue

" _Can it get any worse?_ " - during flashback/Thoughts

 **Pairing: Sasu/Saku**

 **Naru/...Karui? What about her? it's her skin the one that is covering half Naruto's face after all...**

 **Chapter 3: Recovery Mission in Suna.**

 **Near the Forest of Death – Small Clinic – Operating room -**

"Forceps." the half-blond young surgeon known as _Kurotsune_ asked presenting his hand to his assistant.

"Here, _Shenshei_!" a VERY young voice replied as a tiny hand waved the surgical instrument around until she met the doctor's hand to handle it to him.

"It's _Sen_...Nevermind." he answered tiredly before admitting defeat.

"Can I have a _shtool_? Or at least longer legs? I can't see you if the table is _s_ _h_ _o_ high." the same voice asked huffing.

"Yes, maybe I should give you a stool." he answered nodding.

"And the legs?"

"Do not push your luck."

"Dammit..."

 **Meanwhile – Waiting Room -**

Sasuke was sitting at the desk by the entrance and calmly looking through a tall stack of papers when he heard the gentle chiming of the small bell they had mounted above the door as somebody entered.

"Good evening! What do you ne-Oh! it's you." the young man started saying before dropping the formal tone to switch to a more annoyed one.

"If not for the fact that we know you are so anti-social by default, we would almost think you don't like us!" Sakura said chuckling as she sashayed towards him to sit on his desk while paying extra care to show her long legs from under her clearly-new (and expensive) Chinese-style blouse.

"Do you like? We think this does wonders to our figure!...And truth be told...We are wearing nothing under it." she then whispered getting closer to his face.

"I see. Very well, I will ask Naruto to up the dose of your hormone-suppressant, it's clear that we have still not hit the right dosage." Sasuke answered with a suffered sigh as he got up from the desk.

"You are oppressing us! What is so wrong in us wanting the two strapping boys we share a Team with to stuff both our holes at the same time?" Sakura asked annoyed and with crossed arms.

 _Sigh!_ "Listen...I get it, _Promiscuity_ is your coping mechanism for all the traumas you went through growing-up, but this doesn't mean you can harass me and Naruto day in and day out. We too have limits and we may get angry for real one day!" Sasuke answered with a growl.

"Goodie! We like BDSM too!" the girl replied smirking.

"GRAAAH!" the other replied with an annoyed roar making the girl laugh.

"Hahahaha! You know we like to tease, but we are also very patient, you will give-in sooner or later, and we will be there waiting." she said with a sing-song voice as she walked towards one of the sofas to sit on it, pleased by the fact that the other DID steal a glance at her gently swaying hips during her short walk.

" _Remember the teachings of the monks! Remember the teachings of the monks!...Or at least the embarrassment of explaining to Naruto WHY you got that wrist cramp and his talk about '_ The risks of over-indulging in _Onanism'_... _That was especially humiliating, along the jokes about me turning blind if I am not careful."_ the Uchiha young man thought in dismay while looking at the sky for mercy.

"Is our doctor still playing with his doll?" Sakura asked while perusing the gossip magazines on the short table in front of her.

"You know he hates when you call it doll. But yes, that little girl is getting good at helping him, sure she still needs the instrumentation to be labeled, but she is starting to recognize everything by herself." Sasuke answered as he sat in front of her and made a point to look only straight at her eyes.

"Huhuhu! We were lying, we ARE wearing panties...It's the bra we decided to be without today." she answered with a saucy wink.

"I never asked." the young man replied swallowing a little.

"But you were checking-out all the same!" she replied amused.

"I DID NOT!"

"How many times will I have to tell you that I HATE people screaming in my clinic?" Naruto asked annoyed as he exited the operating room while still wearing his surgeon mask and attire.

"Sorry, Naru-chan!" Sakura answered smirking.

"Just because Kakashi-san asked me to not sew your mouth shut, because I am really tempted." the half-blond said grumbling as he took away both mask and gloves to light-up his pipe and take a long drag.

"We know you are tempted, and we don't mind helping you _relax_ back in your office, this dress is so tight, you would need just a sneeze to tear it off from us." she answered winking.

"If I was any other man I would have jumped at the occasion, but if I learned few things outside Medicine from my Patients and their life stories is that one should not stick his penis in crazy. So for now I think I will pass, thank you." the doctor answered nonplussed.

" _Tch!_ We hate that rule!" Sakura answered offended.

"The patient is ready for recovery, _shenshei!_ " a short girl with reddish-brown hair said as she somehow pushed the wheeled bed hosting a pale woman towards a side corridor near the waiting room.

"Good, bring her to bed number three and keep her under watch, call me if she wakes up." he answered creating a clone to accompany the kid to the accorded bed.

"...Freaky." Sakura muttered shivering.

"You share your body with an alien organism saying that comes from space and that is forever bonded to you...What can you possibly see as _freaky_ in my assistant?" Naruto asked honestly curious.

"You built her with pieces you took from a dead woman." Sakura answered shivering.

"Patient Shiraguchi was NOT dead when I removed her _Teratogenous Cystoma_ , nor she was dead when I _assembled_ my assistant using the parts as you call them! That woman had a whole _brain, heart, pair of lungs and stomach_ along _eyes_ andpretty much the various fundamental organs completely formed and jumbled together inside her belly...I just put all where it was supposed to be, added arms and legs and a skeleton, and covered everything with an external layer of synthetic skin I normally use for burnt victims...Even her hair are original! In the end I just gave her the Life our God for some reason refused to give her himself." the Doctor answered.

 _Gurgle!_ "And you can talk of that stuff right after lunch?" Sasuke asked looking green on his face.

"I am a surgeon, I saw worse. We medics see just as much blood and gore as any veteran shinobi if not more since _**WE**_ are the ones that usually have to patch the ' _warriors'_ back together after each mission." Naruto answered calmly.

"I couldn't have said it better." Tsunade said chuckling as she entered the room.

"Hokage-sama." the trio answered with a short bow once seen the woman.

"Relax, boys! I have a mission for you. Top Priority." Tsunade said making the members of the renewed Team 7 stand to attention.

"What is it?" Sasuke asked.

"Somebody last night attacked Suna to kidnap their Kazekage, and today at dawn they finally breached through to kidnap both her and her brother, we just now got their request for help." the woman replied.

"The Kazekage of Suna? wasn't he a man?" Sakura asked.

"That was the father of the current one, the man died during a failed attempt of Suna to help Sound Village to invade Konoha." Naruto answered wearing back his normal clothes plus black coat.

"The current one is Sabaku no Temari, her brother Gaara is the Village Jinchuuriki, an unstable boy that apparently only listen to Temari." Tsunade explained.

"He is not unstable, he has signs of long-term sleep-deprivation and paranoia, resolve those two things and he is normal...Albeit kinda blunt in the emotional department."

"And how do you know?" Sasuke asked.

"I had been called a couple of times to fix the latest victims of the old Kazekage's suicide missions about killing Gaara. Very dysfunctional family theirs, there are enough traumas and badly-buried issues to drive a psychologist mad." Naruto explained shrugging.

"And how do you know that?" Tsunade asked curious.

"After the third time I had to sew back the legs of the same guy I started to get curious, so at the next call I pumped my patients full of _stimulants_ and had them spill everything they knew. I wrote all those good information down for later use." he answered smirking.

"If you have time I will like to give a look at your notes then. Getting back on track, the culprits seem to be members of the up-until-now quiet Organization known as ' _Akatsuki'_." Tsunade said looking at the blond intently.

"I don't like that ' _Up until now'_ part." Sasuke said with narrowed eyes.

"We don't like it neither." Sakura added growling.

"That because until last year all we knew about them was that they were just another ' _Organization'_ of mercenaries banding together to take risky, or down-right _illegal_ , missions..." the Hokage answered sighing.

"And those usually self-destruct in a couple of years _at best_ because of greed with each member either split-up to go their own way...Or killing each other to get the biggest slice of money." Sasuke said.

"But the Akatsuki didn't implode." Naruto added.

"Exactly. Now they seem to have stopped taking missions and focused their efforts on acquiring Jinchuuriki." Tsunade said.

"What?!" the three said in surprise.

"Yep! For all their talents, as several _**S-Class**_ Missing-nins have been spotted wearing the easily-recognizable cloak of the Organization, most of them are not exactly mentally-stable enough to be properly stealthy and not be seen at all. They have clearly started with both the _Ichibi_ and the _Nibi_ as both Suna and Kumo reported being attacked recently and Suna has now been robbed of their Jinchuuriki..." Kakashi said as he too entered the room.

"So the One-tailed Tanuki and the Two-tailed Cat are already in their hands?" Naruto asked.

"Not at the same time as Kumo still has their Jinchuuriki, the _Nibi_ attack could have been either a _Test_ to see if they could capture the Vessel, or a way to make the Jinchuuriki _weak_ for later capture." Tsunade answered.

"But wouldn't the Biju make its Vessel heal faster?" Sakura asked confused.

"Not exactly." Naruto said shaking his head and putting down his pipe.

"Eh?"

"Each Biju gives a ' _Gift'_ to its Vessel, voluntarily or not is up for debate, but it is in a sense a unique gift...Two Biju cannot give the same ability to their Vessel. My ' _Healing Power'_ ironically though does not come from the Nine-tailed Fox I have sealed in me ( _Kurama_ ) that instead simply let me detect _Emotions_ in a wide radius around me, but it is just a nice ' _Bloodline-like'_ ability of the Uzumaki Clan I am part of. Even if any Biju actually CAN help in part the Vessel to heal faster, in any Biju's case Kurama comprised we are talking of something around...20 to 25% faster healing than normal, I guess, if not a little bit more...If we REALLY need to give numbers to it, that is. So a big enough wound can still make the Jinchuuriki an easy target for later attacks." the half-blond explained.

"From what we could gather the ones attacking Kumo were not the same attacking Suna, so maybe they are also trying to see who between them is better suited to capture each Biju...By the way, would that mean that it was not thanks to the Kyuubi if you could recover from your accident?" Kakashi asked sadly.

"In a way he ' _helped a little'_ in that regard, but we are...Not on speaking terms, shall we say, he prefers to stay in his Seal and do not interact with me, sometimes I still try to talk with him, but I am always met with silence. I am starting to lose hope about reaching-out to him." he answered shrugging.

"That is also why I am concerned about asking you three to go to Suna, if the Akatsuki really has their eyes on the Jinchuuriki for some reason...Sending ours outside AGAINST them may be a very bad idea." Tsunade said sighing frustrated.

"It's either in Suna NOW or here in Konoha when they will decide that it is my turn, they won't stop trying to capture me just because I stay here." the young man answered calmly.

 _Sigh!_ "I know, I do not like it, but I know that is also true." Tsunade answered with a defeated tone.

"For now we say we help Suna, we still have been asked for help." Sakura said.

"That is why we have been tasked with this, one of the attackers was the missing-nin known as Sasori, former puppet master of Suna and-"

"And universally-known as expert in Poisons and Toxins, even if people know him better as the greatest Puppet-User Suna had ever produced after Lady Chiyo." Naruto said with narrowed eyes interrupting Kakashi.

"He hates the guy, a couple of our patients died because his custom-made poisons are damn hard to counter." Sasuke explained.

"They were hard to counter up until NOW, but I recently managed to crack open his favourite formula, then the others followed soon after, I have antidotes now." the half-blond added with a savage smile.

"The other is an explosive expert from Iwa, his name is Deidara. He seems to have a sick attraction to explosions so he was more than happy to bombard Suna until Temari-san and her brother came out to defend the Village." Tsunade continued saying.

"They probably used Temari-san as a hostage to get to Gaara-san, so we'll have to save both." Kakashi added.

"We can do that! We are no afraid of explosions!...If they are not too loud...We hate loud noises." Sakura said in determination before deflating a little.

"So you accept?" Tsunade asked.

"Yes!" Team 7 and Jounin Sensei answered as one.

"Then hurry up and go, the sooner you get there the better." Tsunade answered making the Team split-up to hurriedly prepare and leave.

"I will send some people I trust here to protect this place," Kakashi said.

"I better not find a single speck of dirt out of place." the doctor answered with a low growl.

"Please _TRY_ to trust my Shinobi at least." Tsunade asked tiredly.

"Tch!"

 **Some time later – Suna – Entrance -**

"HOY! HOOOOOY!" one of the ANBU standing outside the entrance to the Desert Village yelled gesticulating wildly as soon as he spotted Team 7 arriving.

"Hu?" Kakashi uttered unsure as he and the others neared the man.

"Need something?"

"You are from Konoha! Good timing! We were stretched thin already so having an extra pair of hands is really appreciated!" the ANBU answered relieved.

"G-Guys?" one of the wounded said with a weak voice, a smile still blossoming on his pale face through the agony he was clearly feeling.

"They got you good, Kankurou." Sasuke said with a sigh as he and Naruto neared him.

"You know him?" Sakura asked.

"He is the brother of Temari and Gaara, and a puppet-user himself. And by the looks of it Sasori used his poison on him." Naruto answered.

"R-Right on-on one, D-Doc!"

"Ah! I remember you! You were still in the hospital, Sakura, so you didn't see the Chuunin Exams; he was in the Teams taking part...But why you two know him instead?" Kakashi asked.

"I treated them after the Invasion failed, I knew about the attack from them since the _wound_ about their betrayal was still too fresh for Konoha's own medics to heal them before sending them home." Naruto answered as he unsealed several vials of colorful medicines.

"My arm...N-Never hurt again after…Y-You patched-it-up! O-O-Our Medics still be-beg Temari to ha-have you join Suna." Kankurou answered with a weak chuckle soon turning into a coughing fit.

"Be quiet. You will waste energies talking." the half-blond said prickling Kankurou's finger to have few drops of his blood fall in a vial of clear liquid that slowly turned blue once corked and shook.

"...He used a slow one, you are lucky he wanted you to suffer." Naruto said nonplussed as he immediately started trafficking with vials and syringes.

"H-H-Hurray!" weak voice and all, the sarcasm in the patient's answer was impossible to miss.

"Need help in extracting some of it?" a near Medic-nin asked.

"If you have to. Start extracting, once most of it is gone I will inject the counter in his veins, it should speed-up the recovery and help his body create anti-bodies for the poison." he then said to the medic as the woman's hands started flashing green.

 **With Kakashi -**

"Kankurou-san's puppets had this in their hands, he managed to get a piece of the kidnappers' coat." one of the ANBU in the meantime said showing to the Jounin a torn piece of fabric.

" _Uhm!_ I can try asking Pakkun to track them down...Just in case, do you also have something of Temari and Gaara-san too? Just to have more than one track to follow." Kakashi asked.

"Go check the Kazekage Office! Look for something we can use!" the same ANBU ordered to his partner.

"Okay." the woman replied disappearing rapidly.

"We would love to help you...but..."

"But the Village is still smoking and damaged? We understand, do not worry, we will deal with this by ourselves!" Sakura answered with a reassuring smile.

"Thank you." the ANBU replied with a small bow of his head.

"THE SON OF THE SILVER FANG!" an old woman bellowed attacking Kakashi.

"Someone you know, Sensei?" Sakura asked bored as she and her Teammates watched the Jounin dodge wave after wave of attacks.

" _Puppet Master_ Chiyo. She sure moves well considered her age." Sasuke added impressed.

"You know age means nothing for a Ninja." Naruto said while rummaging in the inner pockets of his coat.

"To be honest!" Kakashi said as he jumped away to dodge a surprisingly-fast flying kick of the woman.

"She hates my father! I actually had very little to do with her!" he kept saying while _waving_ between her attacks.

"Oh, goodie! _Indirect-revenge_ , so pathetic it's almost comical..." the half-blond doctor said nearing the growling woman.

"Hello again, Lady Chiyo. Your back is still troubling you?" he then asked presenting his hand to the woman.

"Uh? Oh! The boy doctor! No, my back is no longer acting-up that much, thank you. Now sorry but I have stuff to do and...Your hand is almighty sweaty, you know?" Chiyo answered shaking the offered hand before grimacing at the very wet feeling from the hand-shake.

"It's not sweat, it's a colorless, odorless and very strong paralyzing agent." Naruto answered while wiping his hands clean.

"Oh..." the puppeteer muttered before falling down face-first on the floor.

"I love when fully-trained, ' _Professional'_ shinobi lower their guards, it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside to trick them." the young man answered with a satisfied smile while Kakashi (VERY begrudgingly) started carrying the paralyzed woman on his back.

"You should have minded you own business." Chiyo drawled weakly from her half-asleep mouth.

"You were acting too childishly for a woman her age and were making us waste time." Sasuke answered huffing.

"Let's hurry then. **Summoning!** " Kakashi said summoning a small dog with a blue coat and cap.

" **Yo! Kakashi!"**

"Good evening, Pakkun. I may need you to track somebody for me, got five minutes?" Kakashi asked with an eye-smile.

" **Yeah, yeah. Hand-over the stuff.** " Pakkun answered annoyed.

"Here, doggie! Who's a good boy! Who's a good boy! Yes you are!" Sakura said giving the small summon the shreds of cloth from the Akatsuki cloaks.

" **Drop it or I will bite your shins.** " Pakkun answered with a dead-pan stare.

" _ **ROAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR!**_ " Sakura answered turning completely black and giving the puppy a deafening roar and a clear view of the wide array of sharp teeth in her mouth.

" _ **Cai!**_ " Pakkun whimpered with lowered ears.

"Sakura, do not scare the summon!" Sasuke said slapping the back of the girl's head with a rolled-up newspaper he had unsealed just for that.

 _Sigh!_ "Okay...Let's go." Kakashi said with a defeated sigh.

" _Hem-Hem!_ " a near ANBU said with crossed arms once pointed at Pakkun.

"...Aaaaw, crap! Someone here has a tissue? I left Pakkun's _'Poo-poo bags'_ back in Konoha!" the Jounin asked in despair.

"..."

"Anybody? PLEASE! I don't want to pick it up by hand!" he asked whining.

"..."

"DAMMMIIIIIIIIIIT!"

 **The next day -**

"You are still sulking." Naruto said uninterested.

"I had to pick-up dog poop with my bare hands!" _Sniff!_ "After washing my hands six times they still smell..." Kakashi answered whining.

"I can testify that," the still paralyzed Chiyo added.

"QUIT YOUR YAPPING! We are on a mission and We will force you to silence if we have to!" Sakura bellowed making both adults cringe and fall silent.

The group had been following Pakkun through Suna's desert and then through a dense patch of forest before coming-out in a deep canyon-like trench, following the small river flowing at its bottom until they saw a _Toori_ Gate blocked by a huge boulder with a seal tag attached to it.

"...A guess about what is inside there," Naruto said after a short pause of thought.

 _Sniff! Sniff!_ " **Yep! The trails stops here, they must be behind that thing**." Pakkun confirmed nodding.

"HEY! HEEEEEEY!" a new voice called-out.

"Uh? Who's there?" Kakashi asked as the Team got in a defensive formation.

"It's me! Tenten!" the bun-haired girl answered surfacing from a small opening in the wall standing at the opposing direction of the boulder.

"Aah! One of Gai's students! What are you doing here?" Kakashi asked making the others relax a little.

"We were about to send a distress message to Konoha, Kakashi. We have Suna's Kazekage here that needs medical help." Gai answered as he too walked out from the cave, as he pointed behind himself the others could see Neji Hyuuga and Rock Lee mounting guard to a very wounded girl with four ponytails.

"Can you do something?" Sasuke asked.

"I have most of my equipment with me, I might be able to fix her up enough for her to be bought back to Suna IF her wounds are that bad." Naruto answered nodding as he removed his coat to revert it and remove the inner layer of cloth from it to the others' confusion.

"Never travel unprepared. Inside his coat there is the equivalent of a whole operating room, minus the machines, the whole thing is like a giant sealing scroll." the Uchiha boy answered to the group's unspoken question.

"While I work on her wounds, you Jounin and guest old lady devise a plan."

"And what makes you think that I will let you-"

" **Move.** " What Neji tried saying died abruptly at the _**COLD**_ glare of the doctor that had the hair behind both boys' neck stand upright.

"Nice to see you, Temari." the young man said kneeling in front of the girl to check her wounds.

"Hi there, doc." the young Kazekage answered weakly.

"I took care of Kankurou, he will pull through." he said with a tiny smile.

"Good...S-Save Gaara too and I will forgive you...Should you _cup a feel_ ' _by mistake'_ while healing me…Even more than one." Temari answered with a challenging smile.

"This would be the second time I saw you naked, and I still won't react the way you want. I am a professional doctor." Naruto answered chuckling.

"The second time...Does it mean we are a couple?" Temari said chuckling weakly.

"You wish. Now be quiet and let me have a look at what they did to you."

"They roughed me up just a little..."

"I can tell."

 **Meanwhile – With Sakura -**

"HOLY SHIT! He is showing human emotions! We didn't think he was capable of that!" the girl said in exaggerated shock.

"He is capable of that, he just doesn't bother." Sasuke answered shrugging.

"DO YOU MIND!?" Chiyo (finally free of the toxins) yelled while still studying the Seal Tag on the boulder.

"Old jeezer!" Sakura muttered crossing her arms.

"Old prune." Sasuke huffed doing the same.

"Tch! Youngsters these days! When I was your age we respected our elders and-"

"Is there a way to remove this thing then, yes or no?" Kakashi asked interrupting the old woman.

"I can easily smash it open! And if I can't then I will lift that! And if it fails too I shall-"

"QUIT IT!" Chiyo yelled making Gai bit his tongue mid-youth-speach.

"GAH!"

"GAI-SENSEI!" Lee yelled in great worry.

" _Itf ohkfay, Leeh! Mhy Youfthfullf Tfongue font fbe thefeated by a mefe bifte!"_ Gai answered with a thumbs-up.

"I didn't understand a single word! But it still sounded amazing, Gai-sensei!" Lee answered with awe-filled eyes.

"Auuuhn!" both Tenten and Neji growled pinching the bridge of their nose in annoyance.

"And you people are considered one of the strongest Villages..." Chiyo muttered in disbelief.

"So? Any plan?" Kakashi asked.

 _Sigh!_ "This kind of seal is connected to other four that are hidden somewhere in this area, to remove this, you also have to tear away the other four AT THE SAME TIME, and only _**THEN**_ we will be able to destroy this thing without surprises or worse popping-up. But be ready, the seal has been altered from the _version_ I know, so the four hidden tags might also have some form of defense mechanism built in." the old lady answered sighing.

"Yosh! Me and my students can easily take care of the four Tags the kidnappers have hidden around along their traps! You and your Team just focus on saving the Kazekage's brother, Kakashi!" Gai offered immediately.

"Thank you, Gai." Kakashi answered.

"I guess it his your turn now, pretty eyes! **DON'T SCREW-UP!** " Sakura said cheerfully before briefly flashing her _Venom Face_ to glare at him.

"Okay, okay. **Byakugan!**...Why are you looking so angry, Lee?" Neji answered annoyed as he scanned the surroundings with his Bloodline until he met the accusatory glare of his Teammate.

"Sakura-chan complimented your eyes..." the sulking boy replied.

"Just drop it, Lee. Please!" Tenten asked exasperated.

"If you are going to fight over who shall be our boyfriend, please remember to also tear-off each-other clothes, we like our pretty boys to fight in the nude with plenty of dangling bits!" Sakura added smirking.

"Found them!" Neji yelled looking very disturbed as he and Lee jumped away to each other so to not stand too close.

"Good job, my Rival for which I DO NOT feel any attraction as I am straight! NOT THAT THERE IS ANYTHING BAD ABOUT IT!" Lee yelled from the other side of the river.

"I am straight too, you moron!" Neji replied with a red face.

"I am not the only one that has ' _Konoha-shinobi-induced head-aches'_ , am I right?" Temari asked amused.

"Mine started as soon as I joined them, yes." Naruto answered sighing.

"We have a plan then: Gai and his Team will deal with the seals stopping us from removing this, Sakura then will gently break this to pieces with her freakish (even by shinobi standards) strength...Any objection?" Kakashi said.

"We have one! Our strength is not _freakish_ , it's ' _Freaking awesome'_! Say it right!" the girl answered annoyed.

"Duly noted. You done there, Naruto?" Kakashi answered nonplussed.

"For now, I hate doing rushed jobs, but I can let it slide this time. She will recover swiftly without a scar. Just cover the entrance to her hide-out, she is under anesthetics and won't wake up for at least a couple hours." the half-blond answered.

"Good. Now, everyone! TAKE POSITION!" Gai yelled as each member of the operation moved to complete their assigned task.

 **Inside the cave – One hour later -**

In the middle of the huge and empty cave there was a giant statue of a multi-eyed being with its eyes closed and its bound hands hold up with each hand holding its fingers up and spread, on each finger there was the projection of featureless humans bar on two where two members of Akatsuki were instead standing with their real bodies.

The Kazekage's younger brother, Gaara, was instead unconscious and floating inside a bubble of faint-blue energy leading inside the statue's mouth, although every once in a while a _trickle_ of yellowish energy would escape Gaara's mouth and eyes to be _swallowed_ by the statue.

" _This is taking too long!_ " the shadowy-silhouette of a man with spiky hairstyle growled in annoyance.

" _Pein-sama, we must have underestimated the Seal Suna used._ " the projection next to the Akatsuki Leader answered with a calming, feminine tone.

"I thought they made it so that the brat could easily access the Biju's power." one of the two members of Akatsuki that were actually in the cave instead of being projections answered equally annoyed.

" _That is exactly the problem! Normally the Seal should contain the Beast tightly and then it would be the Jinchuuriki's job to '_ Force-out' _the Chakra! But the fools did a poor job and now we risk over-loading the Statue because we would extract too much Tailed Beast Chakra at once_ _if_ _we use the normal ritual!"_ the Leader bellowed in anger.

" _Yeah, tinkering with the Ritual to '_ slow it down' _enough to match the brat's Seal_ _and its Chakra output_ _was no easy task, let me tell you._ " another projection answered annoyed.

" _Be quiet, Kakuzu!_ " the only female member of Akatsuki answered silencing her colleague.

"How long before we are done?" the other member of Akatsuki present asked with a bored voice.

"We are almost done, Deidara. So shut-up!" Sasori answered with an animalistic growl.

It was in that moment that the boulder they had place outside exploded to small, pebble-sized pebbles shooting inside the cave in a dense cloud of smoke.

"What the?" Deidara said in surprise as a duo of thick ropes of webbing shot-out from the smoke to latch on the young Jinchuuriki to pull him away.

"DON'T YOU DARE!" Sasori yelled as from under his cloak a long tail-like chain went shot forward to intercept the red-haired body only for a glowing card to hit it with enough force to blow it back.

At the same time a thick blueish smoke covered the cave forcing the two Akatsuki members to jump away.

" _Kill them and retrieve the Jinchuuriki! We cannot stop now at a step from completing the extraction!"_ the Leader yelled furious.

"WE ARE HEEEEEERE!" Sakura yelled with a cheeky smile as Team 7 plus Chiyo made their appearance.

"You dare using poison on me?!" Sasori asked.

"Although I would LOVE the irony of you dying from poisoning, that was just my **Endorphin Smoke**. A small something to help Gaara-san withstand whatever you were trying to do." Naruto answered as he was already checking on the young man.

"Is he stable?" Kakashi asked while never lifting his eyes from the two Missing-Nins.

"Barely, I should have used adrenaline instead, but I can fix my error easily enough." he answered creating a couple of clones.

"Very well, have your clones hide Gaara-san, me and Sasuke will deal with Sasori, he is a long-range fighter so he is more in our field of expertise." Kakashi said nodding.

"I can't wait!" the Uchiha boy answered with his hands already holding a deck-full of cards each.

"Then I guess we will play with the doll boy, right?" Sakura asked cracking her knuckles.

"Then I will help you, Sasori is also my responsibility." Chiyo added.

"Then I guess I will divide myself between helping both groups and keeping Gaara-san safe?" Naruto asked.

"No. Focus on helping Sakura and Lady Chiyo, as you said, you have the antidotes to Sasori poisons, it will make fighting him easier." Kakashi answered.

"So be it." the half-blond answered nodding.

" _Sasori, Deidara."_ The Leader said with his eyes narrowing slightly.

"Yes?" both answered.

" _The boy with the black cloak, capture him alive and bring him to me_." the shadowy figure ordered.

"Ookay." Deidara answered shrugging unsure.

" _That half-black face...Pein-sama...Is he?_ " the mysterious woman whispered.

" _Yes."_

" _I see_..." the woman answered as she too watched the young doctor intently.

" _Call us once done dealing with those pests. Follow your orders and have NO MERCY!_ " the Leader ordered while his and every other member's projection faded away along the statue they were standing on rapidly sinking underground.

"Finally a nice fight!" Deidara said excited as he summoned a huge clay-made bird for him to ride.

"Just see to not be killed." Sasori replied as he readied his metallic tail once again.

They all stood in silence until Sakura's web grabbed Sasori's tail to pull him on the ground for her to assault making her punches demolish the ground under him as soon as he dodged, all this while Sasuke's cards and Kakashi's **Kunai Gake Bunshin** projectiles intercepted mid-way Deidara's clay crickets in a series on explosions as Naruto's clones hurriedly escaped with Gaara's barely-alive body to hide it helped by the original half-blond covering their escape.

The first fight against Akatsuki had barely started and already the whole place was about to be leveled to the ground.

 **AH-HA! No fight in this one! I am Soooooooo sorry! But I will save it for the next chapter!**

 **Like that, just for the sake of being an asshole! XD**

 **And for giving it the "proper" space it deserves by giving it a whole chapter dedicated just to it.**

 **Yes, here Temari is the Kazekage.**

 **Yes, Gaara is STILL ALIVE as the extraction took longer than anticipated.**

 **NO, I am not sorry about those changes and I won't change a thing, so don't ask XD.**

 **BYEEE!**

 **Tr230.**


End file.
